Santana: You can drill me any time. Santana and Carl, The Rocky Horror Glee Show. Santana: Okay, look believe what you want, but no one's forcing me to be here. Dave: I think I can take a couple of queers and a girl. But then well, Ill let her speak for herself: Thank you, guys. Quinn: We all should've known that a Valentine's Day wedding was just asking for a disaster. My private feelings. Santana to Will, Blame It on the Alcohol. I love you. No one in this room can tackle a massive dance number except for Brit. Also, honestly, Santana would still be getting royalties off that thing. like one of those cats that can smell cancer. Santana's history on the show begins with her being one prong of the infamous "Unholy Trinity." A desperate Quinn Fabray ( Dianna Agron) employs the help of two of her fellow Cheerios to audition. Cello guys can you hang back for a second, Im gonna need you for this one. A baby? And I dont wanna fight anymore, Im just too tired. You are my first love. I just want you. I'm not interested in the boys, or the makeup, or the polyester outfits. Why dont you save the lecture for the theater nerds that are gonna starve in New York while desperately trying to tap dance their way into the chorus of Godspell No offense, Gayberry. No! And two, they grant wishes. Brittany: He's really not. Have something you want to. Santana to Quinn after finding out Quinn's dating her professor., Thanksgiving. Did professor Patches teach you that one in between quickies on his office couch? And maybe if you used them, you wouldn't have more oil than the Middle East on your face. What Naya Rivera did to transform Fleetwood Macs Songbird is nothing short of magic. (Points at kid)bye. I wants on them froggy lips, and I wants on them now. Privacy Policy. See here's what's gonna go down. Investigating the mystery of God-could-you-be-more-annoying? Or maybe i, of the gay rights movement every time you so much as coo, cheese together or farted. Its not actually the worst obviously but to follow up the remarkable Mash Up with an episode called I Kissed a Girl that turned out to be this felt cruel. I'm smarter about other people than the both of you, you have to trust me. In my mind, there is no question that the Rumor Has It/ Someone Like You mash up is the greatest performance in the shows history. There was always a stupid boy and he never treated her the same way I would. Even I felt a little something in my lady loins when he did that magic sex dance. I have been LWs gf and, This podcast is one of my best friends. You know, I'm honestly surprised you didn't re-enact what was clearly the formative event of your own teenage years and Sandusky the poor kid right there and then. That's how my abuela puts me to sleep at night, and she was not a nice lady. Quinn: Do you want me to slap you again? Puck: I'm Finn Hudson, I'm quarterback of the football team. When it comes on you scream and you jump and you dance like a kid to this timeless and utterly perfect pop song. Homeless will be homeless for a while, that's sort of the problem. Aren't you were paying. Her wrath of words is called Snix Juice. I felt all of this so deeply. With boys, it was about doing it but also about what doing it said about me and what I said about it. Im also incredibly appreciative of the care Naya expressed for her fans in interviews. If he doesnt get it then he doesnt deserve to have you as his campaign manager. (Claps). Sebastian: Red dye number 6. Okay, I know that Finn had his doubts about God but I am convinced that squishy tits is up in heaven right now clopped down to his new best friend fat Elvis hoping themselves to have picnic of baby back ribs smothered in butter scotch pudding in tater tark grease. She looked like Pippi Longstocking, but like, Israeli. Theres a brief moment after Kurt is elected prom queen as a cruel joke that Santana rushes out of the room crying. Santana: Oh, sure I can. So often on Glee theyd shoehorn a storyline to fit a song they wanted to do, or stretch a song to fit a plot, but with this mashup, it didnt actually matter what the words were saying or whether or not they had anything to do with the plot of the episode. Santana to Will about Kurt and Rachel, Saturday Night Glee-ver. I cant get her If I Die Young out of my head lately. She serves Santana arroz morro with either lechn or bistec to eat. You look like an assless J-Lo. Rachel, Santana, and Kurt were joined on the North Pole setting by four little. I'm trying to apologize to Lumps The Clown. Those romantic saps. Like a sad little panda. Santana: Well, that's why I brought you here, to cheer you up. Lumps, let me just say out loud what everyone here is thinking. It was like being smothered by a sweaty, out-of-breath sack of potatoes that someone soaked in body spray. I mean my girlfriend girlfriend. Kurt: To get back at Puck, aren't you guys dating? ", Today is your lucky day, because Auntie Snicks just arrived on the Bitch Town Express. Okay, maybe Brittany and I are too young to get married. Santana to Mr. Schuester (about Quinn), Audition, Well, congratulations. Yay. (Rachel starts crying) Oh God. I have to just be me.. I wanted it for itself. Its layers upon layers of ridiculousness, but brilliantly so. You are not playing Yente the lesbian match maker. Heather said it best: I loved seeing Santana succeed. FAIR USE DISCLAIMERCopyright Disclaimer under section 107 of the Copyright Act of 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comm. We humanize terrible white men in our society in large part because white men are often the only people we humanize in our stories. elaborate wet dreams. I'm in love with myself, and I would never change a thing. I wanna make a fake baby with you!". You're really not gonna tell me about the stick? Like that whole top row. How could my running mate win and I didnt? Blaine's handsome brother said it best: college is a waste of time. I am forever grateful that Naya pushed for the storyline to be more than it was intended to be. Dave: None of your business, J Lo. They were never about the kind of love she feels for Brittany, or even how she felt about Dani. I loved seeing her happy. I got Sebastian on tape admitting there was rock salt in that slushie that blinded Blaine. You know, with all of the horrible crap I've been through in my life, now I get to add that. Trent: Wait, are you serious, is he gonna be okay? Brittany: That Sour Patch Kids are gummy bears that turn into drugs? Standing ovation for Miss Naya Rivera Go. And you know, Ive never been with anybody like that before. Santana: Are we dating or what? Its one of the least flashy numbers, but one of the best. : Tamara de Lempicka Didnt Care Who Knew, Trans Texans Are Being Surveilled, This Is Everyones Issue, I Had a Weekend to Explore Queer Miami, It Was a Pastel Paradise, You Need Help: You Fat-Shamed Your Beautiful Girlfriend, The Autostraddle Encyclopedia of Lesbian Cinema, How Im Navigating Play Parties as a Disabled, Immunocompromised Kinkster, To L And Back: Generation Q Podcast 309: When a Fire Starts to Burn, Pop Culture Fix: Aubrey Plazas Sexy Disaster Reporter Was Too Weird Even for SNL, No Filter: Sarah Paulsons Birthday Post for Holland Taylor Cleared My Skin, This Is -Ussy: On Mainstream Cultures Embrace of Queer Language, Pop Culture Fix: Janelle Mone, Niecy Nash-Betts Win Critics Choice Awards. The easter colored suburban mom clothes, the giant swing, the stock footage feeling of it all. As my cousin walked down the aisle in her handsome white tuxedo to meet her wife, my mother sang Songbird, their song of choice. It was then as it is now, I love you, I love you, I love you, like never before. Santana: Do you think this voodoo doll looks enough like Rachel Berry to actually work? Hey Mister Arnstein, here I am! she raises both hands to the orchestra and she smiles into the audience. I hear that Rachel has a bit of a schnoz. Rory: You're skinny like all the crops failed on your family's farm. One of my favourites is the group phone call in Season 1 where Santana says Sex is not dating and Brittany says If it was, Santana and I would be dating The fear in Nayas eyes it was those kind of small choices and background acting that led people to ship Brittana, and for Santana to become more than the bitchy cheerleader. Alright, you know what Rachel? Santana: Rachel. Finn: The whole school already knows. Santana to Kurt about his poster, I Am Unicorn. So get up in my grill, 'cause Brits and I wants to get our anesthesia on. This song was easily one of the top three best performances on the entire run of Glee. Santana: [smiles but then looks around] But, like, under a napkin. All those in favor of voting Rachel down a second time? #teens. But I gots to say I finally feel like I have found my people. Lauren: [sarcastic] Thank you. But Santana was too bright, too once-in-a-lifetime, and Naya Rivera worked too hard at her career for far too long, taking bit commercials and one-off guest stars since she was a child, for this not to be her moment. I'm sick of being backup to Rachel Berry. Oh, nope, you know what I think that you should ask Santa to get your daddy a job with some dental benefits because your grill is jacked up. Or Tribeca. Just like that she can go from breaking your heart to making you laugh. Sure did. Can't I think about it for like a day? She's a mother! Brittany to Kitty, Guilty Pleasures. You wanna play with me, Kurt? Cause I can play. I cant believe its been ten years since this moments happened. Heres Naya Rivera, this Black Puerto Rican actress who fought so hard against the producers for Santanas coming out in the first place. She was right, and she mattered, even if she was just a teenager. Non-threatening to the characters inside the show or outside in the audience. She is a hero, and deserves to be remembered as such. I just think its really sweet and romantic and Naya is so vulnerable and pretty and her voice is so lovely. Topless is as nude as anyone is ever gonna want to see you. #monologues Thank you, guys. Santana: Yup, sure did. Santana: Who, Rachel? We can all be honest here, if a picture is worth a thousand words then that dress is worth a million dollars. Im sorry. I've had mono so many times it turned into stereo. Slut. Though I don't know whose toxic vagina would need that much of that stuff, I mean if you're producing that much yeast you should probably start a bakery. Santana: That is the lamest thing I didn't understand a word of. Its the single most thrilling three minutes the Glee ever produced. You know, we always were two ends of the same bitch-goddess spectrum. I'm like a lizard. I'm sure that Sam has been at the doctor's office and rifled through pamphlets on mouth reductions. I look hot and smart. The way shes afraid to look up off the floor and into the choir room. I will never understand why these things happen. Its really different, but seeing another Latina women stand up for herself and her culture was so validating to my lived experiences. Thank you Naya. I felt like no one could possibly understand what I was going through when I was 16, and then, all of a sudden, there was Santana, reflecting my feelings back to me from my favorite TV show. Its important to me that Santana Lopez was a bitch. What I realized What I realized is why I'm such a bitch all the time. I mean, bake sales are kind of bougie. by saphireheart12 on desktop and mobile. Elliott: You know I'm actually just here to get her sheet music. But medias idea of an underdog is skewed by 80s teen movies written by cis straight white men. with a Is that an aspect of why this moment feels so awful because this is the first time were learning how to mourn this particular sort of loss? feels like a fever dream that does NOT have a, I love this, please let me read your kinky biography. Hands down my favourite and the best ever scene on Glee. He never remembered her birthday, or noticed how much work it took to get her hair just like that over her shoulder. Kurt: Can we talk about the giant elephant in the room? I am a thousand percent sure that Im actually going to be famous, just like Im a thousand percent sure that our man-child piano player keeps a petite Eurasian locked in a trunk underneath his bed. For the Latinx community specifically, Santana was one of the only on-screen depictions of a queer Afro-Latina. Of Santana. Hi DM! I may actually be dead right now. We can win two National championships this year. What if I just told your BFF about her BF and his man-whoring ways? That's what I thought, right? This is only temporary. Kurt: Oh, Gershwin song lines scavenger hunt! I dont want to fight anymore. Rory: Hey, listen here. You know, I just wanted to say that, I thought that you blew that song outta the water, and, totally nailed the assignment. Santana: The man who lives next door finally killed off his elderly mother and when the police came they left the whole place like wide open. He's made of magic. ". This is for us. Quinn: You have surgery when you get your appendix out. Normally you dress like a fantasy of a perverted Japanese business man with a very dark specific fetish but I actually dig this look. I have been heartbroken over this. Its the dress that sells the song before Santana even opens her mouth. Look, my dad's a doctor, and not a tooth doctor, a real one. Naya, girl, Im just so sorry. Thank you, Naya, for all of the knockout moments you gave us. How does that sound? Santana: You did this to me! I mean I am, just not now. Santana to Sue and New Directions, Extraordinary Merry Christmas. Because the thing is, being brave and speaking the truth doesnt always go the way you plan. You're going to stay in the closet, get married, get drunk to have relations with your wife, have a couple kids, maybe become a state senator, or a deacon, and then get caught in the men's room tapping your foot with some page. Quinn: You have surgery when you get your Appendix out. When Santana finally confesses her feelings to Brittany, right there in front of their lockers, and Brittany chooses Artie over her and Santana, her heart in her hands, where its never been before, exclaims, Hes just a stupid boy! I felt that. Santana: That sounds like torture. Those arent generic Latinx details. Santana: Yeah, I do. And just when you thought it couldn't get any gayerit does. The transcendent vulnerability, more than weve ever seen from Santana. Brittany: I have pepperoni in my bra. Amber Riley and Naya Riveras voices together are raw power. A way to stir shit up, often with Brittany by her side. It means your boyfriend is full of crap, Hobbit. 2021-22, Piling Larang Akademik 12 Q1 Mod4 Pagsulat Ng Memorandum Adyenda at Katitikan ng Pulong ver3, Kami Export - Athan Rassekhi - Unit 1 The Living World AP Exam Review, Leadership class , week 3 executive summary, I am doing my essay on the Ted Talk titaled How One Photo Captured a Humanitie Crisis https, School-Plan - School Plan of San Juan Integrated School, SEC-502-RS-Dispositions Self-Assessment Survey T3 (1), Techniques DE Separation ET Analyse EN Biochimi 1. Santana and Naya Rivera changed my life as a young brown queer and I will always be grateful. Rory: Whoa. Brittany: Mm hm. Santana: Quick, go get some moist towels. This is so sad. They're fooling around! Can't tell you how many times I wanted to enjoy a crisp pickle, but couldn't find anyone to suck the lid off the jar. No one gets it. She nearly breaks her face in two because she knows, she really knows, that she did it. in the Locker Room: On Fighting for Trans* Youth with Words as Weapons, The Fosters Episode 317 Recap: Trust No One, Art Attack! Santana about Brad, Saturday Night Glee-ver. Santana: And Pablo Escobar? It's like, the best deal ever. The fierce, confident, swaggering Santana having this quiet moment where her voice is actually quivering a little was so impactful. His hair's already starting to grow back. With who's vagina? I am loving this look on me. What would you do? He lets go of my Eggo! It was just such a joyful, fun performance. Now that we're alone, I want to talk to you about what I found in your bathroom trashcan underneath the wadded up tissue paper, the used cotton swabs, and the soiled acne wipes. Later, Santana cuts through the dancers and bellows, Dont Forget Me! And I walk around so mad at the world, but Im really just fighting with myself. But nothing is as eternally hilarious to me maybe on TV ever as Santanas Yeast-I-Stat commercial. I accept that about you. Let us give you an introduction into the way we work. [puts a napkin over her and Brittany's hands]. So why am I talking about this? So Im going to leave the obviously iconic, emotional, perfect moments to the people who have lived with this show, this character, and Nayas singular performance for years. Even though I never knew you personally, you will always be part of my life. MIKE: Is that why you're wearing blue contacts today, Tina? Your bizarre, psychosexual obsession with that Glee Club was disturbing from the first moment you stalked a nude student in the showers. To be honest, I dont know if I wouldve done it if it hadnt been for the smallest detail, sort of blurred in the background, almost off frame theres not a single recap that Ive ever read that includes it, but theres a Dominican flag on Abuelitas refrigerator. How did that marriage work out for you. Finn: Because I love her and I don't want to hurt her. Youve got a crush on my girl, Brittany. cheese together or farted. She's blond and awesome and so smart. Santana: Yes, we can. Carl: I get that all the time. Brittany: [smiles and holds Santana's hand] The only straight I am is straight up bitch., We spend a lot of time talking about Santana Lopezs musical numbers, and I suppose for a show like Glee thats pretty par for the course but theres nothing that made Santana more alive than Naya Riveras impeccable comic timing. They don't care. Brittany: Sweet lady kisses. Maybe he finally got freaked out by your strange Naya Rivera, who played Glee's resident mean girl Santana Lopez, recently spilled some tea in her new book Sorry Not Sorry: Dreams, Mistakes, and Growing Up. Santana: I don't really talk during. Shes the star. Play over 265 million tracks for free on SoundCloud. I guess those contracts I signed for those commercials said that I waived my right to residuals, in exchange for a lifetime supply of Yeast-I-Stat. Santana taught us well. You told Coach Sylvester about my summer surgery! Rachel: I will totally slap you again. So in Season 2, when I heard those opening. We're like besties for life. So in Season 2, when I heard those opening notes of a song I knew so well, when Santana Lopez herself sang my name right there on my TV screen, it felt like a gift just for me. Cant I just have one night where Im queen? I have to just be me, Santana to her grandmother, Alma Lopez, I Kissed a Girl. Santana to Finn about Blaine, Pot o' Gold, Heres the deal, pixie boy. I rarely get genuinely upset over celebrity deaths, but yours hit me hard queen. My carousel horse sweater should make me look like an institutionalized toddler, but no. I haven't danced that hard since nationals two years ago. Maybe that has something to do with it. And maybe that wouldve been more tolerable if the episode centered her feelings instead of Finns. It learned me two things. But not this. Ive seen what you can do, and what you can do is stand in the back, sway, and sing very, very quietly, Speaking from experience, Finn is terrible in bed. You are the first boy who made me feel loved, and sexy, and visible. Maybe he finally got freaked out about your strange obsession with old people that causes you to skulk around nursing homes This whole episode is legit queer culture. The nervous, darting looks. Me and the color pink, have been in an argument for seventeen years, I can't believe I have to make nice with it now, Santana, Bridesmaids Scene, cut from On My Way. Brittany: C'mon, we can't be mad at Rachel forever. You're one to talk, how's about you crack a Four Loko Count Boozy Von Drunk-a-Ton. We made that for us! Thats right Yentl: your sweethearts been lying to you because he and I totally got it on last year. There are quantifiably positive assets to this mash-up: the song suits Mercedes and Santana vocally, its got good choreography, its a well-orchestrated mash-up the dresses are cute. You are not my principal. To win the election. Santana: Lets just keep this on point. this definitely makes me more curious about visiting Miami! And you know what? Below are each of our favorite Santana Lopez moments. Glee Season 6 Episode 3 Quotes [to Santana] Okay, I may be a genius, but how can I argue with the logic of your giant, generous heart? I'm thinking about joining Shelby's new show choir. Escucha! Kurt: One: Rachel is beautiful. Why is everyone staring at me like Im Finn and I just won a butter-eating competition? The kind of lesbians who would allow straight people to wrap themselves up in the cozy fantasy that gay people are just like them. The death of celebrities usually does not impact me, but this one really has. I mean, if I was made out of plastic, I'd be scared of a lot of things too; open flames, barbeques, but then, I found this!This is a pager, my friends. Santana: You're addicted to vests. Stream Another Quinn Fabray Monologue. Its hard to pick a favorite Santana solo, but I think its gotta be Songbird, for me, both for Santnas story arc and for Naya Riveras performance. Its the tiny blue dress. Naya as Santana as a happy lady with a yeast infection, inside a commercial, inside a phone shes holding to proudly share her triumph with Rachel. Maybe that has something to do with it. Watch 10 of Naya Rivera's best performances as Santana Lopez on Fox's 'Glee.' . Our TV Team has spent the last two weeks reliving some of our favorite moments from Naya Riveras world-changing work on Glee. If Rachel wants my sloppy seconds she should at least know the truth. When Im with Brittany, I finally understand what people are talking about when they talk about love. Also, she thinks youre a spritely, green, mythological creature, but I know youre a potato-eating poser. Thank you, Finn, especially. Santana to Noah Puckerman, Silly Love Songs. Santana: This food was unsatisfactory. glee monologues santana. Maybe I need That show was messy, but as a baby gay, Santana was everythingggg. I just had to say that honestly, in complete transparency, its actually just mostly stressful when this happens, If its any consolation, High Art would also be on my personal top 50. Weren't roller rinks outlawed in, like, 1981 for being totally lame? Finn: What are you talking ab- Not only am I giving you full visitation rights to the set of rambunctious twins that live on my rib cage, you get the chance to show that pastry bag Finn that he cant mess with Sam Evans.
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